एक ख़्वाब

Best viewed in Internet Explorer v 5.0 and above.
--------------------------------------------------------------
निगाहों को रोक लिया था
धड़कनें भी समझ गयी थी
दिल का वो समंदर चुप-चाप था
वो नामुम्किन ख़्वाब सो चुका था

अचानक कहीँ पर कुछ हुआ
और एक ऊंची सी लहर उठी
वो हसीं मुस्कान याद आ गयी
आज फिर तुमसे प्यार हो गया

मेरे होश को कह दो
आज मुझे सोने दे
आज बख्श दे क्योंकि
आज फिर तुमसे प्यार हुआ है

इन पलों को समेट लेने दो
इस एहसास को जी लेने दो
काश लब्ज़ जुबां पे आ पाते
काश ये ख़्वाब सच होता

माना ये ख़्वाब मुमकिन नहीं
पर इक ज़र्रा भी गम नहीं
ख़्वाब ही सही, तुमसे प्यार तो है
और मुझे इस ख़्वाब से प्यार है
-----------------------------------------------------------------

The Phoenix Rises.....

August 2006
There was a whole lot of stuff going around regarding 'Ragging' in I.I.T. Kharagpur. The result..... 'Phoenix Productions' was conceived and created in I.I.T. Kharagpur, by few individuals..... 2 to be exact... to express themselves but ... in a humorous way.
The debut production .... widely appreciated "Tedhi Baat".


Late August 2006
The hue-n-cry regarding Reservation in IIMs and IITs was at its peak. The director of IIT Kharagpur took a stand.... and the Phoenix showed up again.... this time... even more successful and applauded..... "Tedhi Baat Dwiteeya" .... the sequel to "Tedhi Baat".


December 2006-January 2007
Placements in IIT Kharagpur. A lot happened. Ecstacy.... Dream Job... Heart-breaks... Compromise... everything. The Phoenix felt its need to show up again. The idea was conceived... the blueprint was ready. But due to avoidable and unavoidable circumstances... it could not show up.

27th April 2006
End semester exams going on in IIT Kgp. The Phoenix could not wait for them to end. The result.... their last production in IIT Kgp..... "dis-Placement".
Here's the current eye-candy of IIT Kgp: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3950103420970617511&hl=en

Some initial responses:
"Awesome is an understatement for this video"
"GODLY"
"U guys rock"
"The best ever video made in IIT Kgp"
"Sach mein sento ho gaye the yaar"

If you have sometime to spare.. do watch out last production and express your view either here and/or in our orkut community: Phoenix Productions

I express my heartiest thanks to all those who appreciated our work. We love you all.
c ya

Pal

Waqt badalne k liye,
Ek lamha hi kaafi hai.
Aaj barson beet gaye,
Aur intezaar baaki hai.

Hazaaron lamhe kho gaye,
Aas mein us pal ke.
Hum khaak chhaante reh gaye,
Uljhe se, paagal se.

Shayad wo pal kahin chhup gaya,
Shayad chupke se chala gaya.
Shayad ek poora arsaa,
Us pal ke dwaara chhala gaya.

Ek ujli si kiran,
Ya wo anjaana kal ho.
Intezaar hi jeevan hai,
Shayad maut hi wo pal ho.

--------------------------------------------------
I have my Final end-sems from tomorrow and I am in no mood to study. Kisi tarah paar ho jaaye yaar.... aur nahin saha jaata.
Jai Ho !!!!

Memories

Today the last class of my undergraduate career got over at 10:30 IST. I had decided to write my last post in class today. The post was supposed to be about the activites going on in the class... as in 'Live Telecast' but... as I woke up this morning... I decided to BUNK the class. So...... no class... no 'live telecast' :P
As a result... I am posting one of my earlier 'class-work' , written a few days earlier. Each stanza in this poem represents a certain stage of my life @ IIT Kgp, starting from the moment when I knew I got through IITJEE.


Safal hone ki wo umang,
Maa k chehre pe wo khushi,
Papa ki awaaz mein wo santosh,
Ab to sirf yaadein hi baaki hain.

Sapno ki duniya mein wo pehla kadam,
Ajnabi hawa mein wo pehli saans,
Akelepan ka wo pehla ehsaas,
Aaj sirf yaadein hi baaki hain.

Galti se galti karne ka wo darr,
Those days of living in terror,
While making friends forever,
Only the memory remains.

That pride of being in control,
Giving it all your heart and soul,
Those brave efforts only to lose it all,
The memory lives, so does the spirit.

It's time to set out,
It's time to show.
It's my turn to leave,
With the memories to follow.

I wish

The ocean was black,
As it looked in moonlight,
The waves making noise,
While putting up a fight.

It were the only sound,
That I would hear,
Apart from the infinite lull,
That I had to bear.

Everything seems normal,
Everything seems fine,
But the void inside remains,
Growing with time.

I wish I could float,
I wish I could fly,
Across the vast ocean,
And into the sky.

Where everything would merge,
And no void remain,
So I won't feel the pinch,
And get rid of the pain.

20 ways to Time-pass in a boring lecture.

1. Chew nails. The time passed is directly proportional to the total surface area of your nails, relative strength of your teeth and your affinity for chewing nails.
2. Watch the fan moving and try to calculate its rpm (rotations per minute). The time passed is directly proportional to observation power and the accuracy of final prediction. (Won't work in winter)
3. Try to guess the native place of the professor by analysing his accent. Knowledge of his/her name would be helpful.
4. Nick-name each student's hair style.
5. Concentrate on the fuse light of the switchboard.
6. Activate 'paper messaging service'. The time passed is directly proportional to individual calibre.
7. Delete redundant pictures from you mobile. (applicable to whom it may concern)
8. Play 'snake' and 'nature park'.
9. Overhear the conversation of the guys behind you and guess their current mental and social status.
10. Write notes. Applicable only to the lone sample of a unique species, known on this Earth as AS ( Department Rank 1 hone ke side effects. BTW I am also AS but not DR 1)
11. Plan out your next trip and/or gifts for friends.
12. Engage yourself in Watch-gazing.
13. Yawn
14. Day-dream. The time passed is directly proportional to the beautiful memories.
15. Sleep. Again it depends on individual calibre.
    
16. Plan put what to wear on Final Day Exams. ( applicable only to IIT Kgpians as they wear fancy dress on that day)
17. Learn to write Bangla as the girl in front practises Bangla Calligraphy in tha back of her copy.
18. Study the 'manuscripts' engraved on the wooden desk. Some samples : "F**K Ya", "MUNNA BHAI RI3", "SEXY", "WH**E", "AAJ BHI PAKA RAHA HAI", "THOKA", "GPL",.....
19. Add some more.
20. Write posts. (applicable only to bloggers)
    

?

As I was savoring the 'Bronze' and the 'Best Direction' in my last Hindi Dramatics in India, my cousin met with an accident and after fighting Death for 3 days.... he left. After 38 years on this earth..... after 5 years of married life.... he left all of us. As I write this, he is up there..... watching me and all others trying to come to terms, trying to believe that he is no more, trying to put the shattered pieces of our lives together, trying to live without him. Every breath that I take ... reminds me of his absence.
I don't know how it happened. I don't know why it happened. I don't know why, of the four persons involved in the accident, only he had to die. I don't know why he left us when Bhabhi is pregnant and my nephew is only 2 years old. I don't know what to say if he asks for his father. I don't know how Bhabhi is controlling herself. I don't know whose fault was it. Perhaps no one's. Perhaps we happened to be at the receiving end of fate. Perhaps Death got Bhaiya's name in its random game. Perhaps this is a nightmare and we all will wake up one fine morning. Or perhaps we'll never. I don't know.
I may not have felt his presence but I am definitely feeling his absence. As I was seeing the flames covering his body , I could feel his soul rising up to the heavens alongwith the smoke. One day each of us will end up similarly. That's life. They say... We have to move on. Yes...... we will move on. We will continue to live. Everything may be close to normal except for Bhabhi. Life won't be the same for her anymore. Never ever.

Jiyo , Muskurao ,
Khush raho kyuki tum zinda ho.
Gham ki wajah kya dhoondhte ho,
Yahan Maut bas ek pal dooor hai.

Long Time no P(ost)

The main reason for this absence of mine from Blogeteria is that I was busy in Inter-Hostel Choreography competition.
Hold on folks.... before you jump out of your chair, smash the popcorn in your hands and roll on to floor laughing... let me tell you that I wasn't dancing . I am a terrible dancer( though I danced the last time around). This time I was directing and I swear to God.... Directing a Choreography is TOUGH !!!! Ours is not the conventional kind you see in films or awards functions. Here we have a theme to depict. So we have to tell a story through dance which makes it essentially a Dance-drama.
Ours was a choreography in the "Third Form". For those who don't know , "Third Form" is a kind of stage production wherein you don't use any props/sets etc. Everything ... be it a table, chair, door.... everything is depicted using people. So our choreo was abstract and entirely different from the others. There were on-stage fumbles and as expected, we didn't win any prize. (We did win the 'Best Lights' but I consider it more a gift than a win)
Winning and losing is part of the game. It's OK we didn't win. I'll always be proud of our design. We fell one day short otherwise it would have been perfect. Nonetheless, its over now. It was my last choreo in India. In a few days I'll be busy with my last Hindi Dramatics in India.
As they say .... "The show must go on."

And Oh.... did I tell you that I have got two more offers..... from Arizona State University and Iowa State University. And I have withdrawn my candidature from two others. One university knows about my USC and so they are not going to offer me anything. Another university says that it has received everything from me except the application fee :P There may have been some error during transaction. And I am not going to pay the fee now. So this makes it a total of 7 results out of 12. Waiting for the remaining 5.

Be happy and Keep Smiling
c ya soon

Look before you mail...

Few days back I received a mail from USC Graduate Admissions . My heart skipped a beat or two when it read that my department had sent over proof that it'll fund me with 36,350 USD while the cost of the program is 46,630 USD and I had to send them the bank letter for the remaining amount.
WHHAAATTT !!!! I M NOT FULLY FUNDED !!!!
And as it happens... I started to think that may be that is the case and my dream of going to USA began to crumble, and that too when my parents were around, celebrating my 'success'.

With a very heavy heart I mailed them back seeking some kind of explanation of my 'fellowship'. And I got the reply that it was simply an 'addition error' and they will mail me the revised offer soon !!!!
Come on people.... next time please use ur calculator... someone could have had a heart-attack!!!!

And yesterday I got The Mail... stating that I would be getting Tuition fee waiver + medial insurance + 30,000 USD for the first year and for the next three years the 30,000 would be reduced to RA which will be a minimum of 23,000 USD. Believe me yaaron ... its enough :) So its offical now. I am going to the US in August beginning provided the US Consulate does not deny me VISA.

As I am typing this post I am all red,green,black,yellow,blue, and what not. HAPPY HOLI TO ALL YOU FOLKS !!! May this Holi fills your life with all the colors possible. I have been experiencing the colors from fews days back !!!!

Happy Holi....
c ya soon

California Calling.......

Post exams was never better. As if the news was waiting for my exams to end ... gham aur khushi ka simultaneous dose hajam nahin hota you see :P
Neways.... instead of going round and round, let me break the Greatest news for me....

Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls..... This is to inform you that .....
I have been admitted to the PhD program in Materials Science and Engineering in University of Southern California, USA for Fall 2007 with a Fellowship for the 1st Year.

Your thunderous applause has duely been appreciated. Thanks a lot for all your wishes. Wishes do work... hence proved. Unless I get a better call, I am joining USC in mid-August.
2007 is the greatest year of my life till now.
If you ask me how exactly am I feeling now.... my answer would be... I want to be on the top of a mountain and scream ... I AM THE KING !!!! but due to lack of words..... I am just smiling right now. It will take sometime for the fact that 'My dream of going to USA is finally materialising' to sink in.
Till then .... be good .......... be happy..... Take care..... and Keep Smiling :)
And .... THANKS A LOT ONCE AGAIN FOR YOUR WISHES :)
Love you all.... c ya soon