Saturday, November 24, 2007

Welcome back Madhuri !!

The Dancing Diva of Bollywood is BACK !!!
And she is looking much more graceful than ever !!!


When we (as in the people of my age ) grew up, we grew up watching Madhuri Dixit, Karishma Kapoor and Kajol. Of course, there were the likes of Mamta Kulkarni but the lesser said about them, the better. Karishma Kapoor was at her best with Govinda (whose comedy I miss so much) and David Dhawan. The over-the-top, loud (at times), whacky, non-sense but 100% comedy. They had the power to generate hysterical laughter, the only condition being that you had to switch your mind off.
No doubt, Kajol is the best among them (and definitely one of the best ever). Be it comedy, or romance , or sometimes tragedy... she delivered point blanc.
And then there was Madhuri Dixit. Her presence was more than enough. And on the top of it... she danced. I bet all the girls of my age practised "madhuri steps" in front of mirror. I doubt if any other heroine had THAT control over the masses.

"How is the movie?"
"Doesn't matter. Madhuri is there."
I can't say about before Madhuri, but after her, I couldn't find any movie which was worth watching just because it had XYZ as the heroine. Take note that I am not using 'actress' because there have been actresses who could pull people on the basis of performance. But making people sit through 2-3 hours by mere her presence..... question mark ---- Madhuri--- Blank.
Blank till Om shanti Om happened. Yes, I can sit through any movie , if it has Deepika Padukone as the heroine. Period.
She is WOW !!!
And now that OSO has come up, the only other WOW-thing in OSO is the performance by 'Omiswaami Shantinathan'. I would conclude by the dialogues of this hilarious scence :

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha . You shotgun. Me quickgun Murugan. Na Ramba, Na nillay rakkhi atti patti katti. Munnyedaar munnyedaar munnyedaar. Yenna Rascalaaa.... thoo die..... Mind it.
(glasses drops).Never mind it. (fight sequence). Yenna rascalaaa... Mind it.
Pappu ... Thyger. ( Mind ith. Thyger cat)
You bad cat. You bad cat. Rascalaa cat. Naughty pussy, naughty pussy, naughty pussy. Who is your daddy now. You want to say sorry.... No sorry. Pussy cat, pussy cat.. where have you been. Have you been to London .... to see the queen.
Find it.
Yenna fly... yenna die............ yenna rascalaaa... Mind it."

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

PhD ke Side Effects

We, a small group of Phd students, were watching this video ......



....... and when the video crossed -1:25 ....

Guy 1 : Hey look.... it is Schroedinger's Equation.
Conclusion : NERD

Guy 2 : Ya.... it is for Hydrogen atom.
Conclusion : No comments

(To have a better look at the equation, pause at -1:13)

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

A question

Not too long ago, there was a shoulder. The exact location is immaterial so you can place it at any point in the space-time continuum as you feel like.
It was a happy shoulder. Though not toned, it was a strong, stable shoulder. Always looking at the brighter side of the world. It had its friends- the other shoulders, brains, bodies etc, though not many. But it didn't complain, for whatever he had was precious.
It was happily walking its path when, at some some point in the space-time continuum, its path merged with that of a beautiful pair of eyes. Destined to walk together with the shoulder, the eyes had no choice but to talk to it. And as it happens with anyone talking to it, they became friends. At least the eyes thought so. Little did they know that the shoulder was falling for them, deeper by each moment. Or may be they knew and chose to ignore. Nevertheless, both continued to walk together, laughing, teasing each other and deliberately avoiding that uncomfortable silence all the way along until they reached a point when their paths diverged for a while.
Both were alone during that course. And while the shoulder kept thinking about the eyes , the eyes met a face on their way. A face which supported them when they were alone. A face which was the smartest face in the world according to the eyes. A face which they fell in love with.
For the first time, the shoulder lost its self-control and it hates itself for that ever since. But the way it is, it recovered soon and decided to be by the side of the eyes for whatever time they had left before their paths diverged again. And it stood by the eyes like a rock. It was there everytime the eyes had to cry, which, more often than not, was because of the face. It was always there to cheer them up. It was always there to comfort them, even though it really didn't believe in its words. Never ever did the shoulder say a word against the face because it knew that inspite of all the pain, the eyes loved it while knowing perfectly well that they would be much more happier with the shoulder.
To the world, the shoulder appeared to be the same strong, stable, determined shoulder of old, but deep inside, it was fragile, delicately poised and on the verge of breaking down. But it could not let the eyes see this as it was their only support. So, it stood firm till their paths diverged, this time for ever. And as the shoulder continues to walk alone, it can't help but to wonder:
Who was wrong? The eyes, for not understanding it; or itself, for not being able to get over the eyes. Perhaps both, perhaps none.


Saturday, October 27, 2007

Hello

It's just another day in the mundane life of Gajodhar Pandey. And just so you know, neither the first name nor the last name, or for that matter, the middle name (which happens to be Ramnarayan) intended to bear any significance to this story whatsoever, but then, things seldom go exactly as intended. Of course, the man who was forced upon these names is significant, in the way that he happens to be our protagonist, one of our protagonists, to be precise.
Gajodhar Ramnarayan Pandey doesn't like his name. Whenever someone calls his name, he feels like he/she is desperately calling GOD for some serious help. He always envied the characters in the fantasy world of Ekta Kapoor, for they had, if nothing else, fancy, modern, futuristic, artistic names. But nevermind, the damage had been inflicted upon him by his Grandma 31 years ago. Once, by mistake( he claims), he talked about legally changing his name and the next thing he knew was that his Grandma had to undergo double bypass surgery. The topic was buried, then and there, in some hospital trash can.
Anyhow, this story is about a day in the life of Gajodhar Ramnarayan Pandey, and not his name. Though Gajodhar loved his work and took good care of the clients, his heart was severely hurt when a female client exclaimed, " Wow, you look young !!" the first time they met. "Thanks Miss Sharma. Just one question though. Why did you expect me to be old?"
"Well...... err...... umm.............. it's just that.... i don't know....."
No wonder the deal didn't materialize.
He dies a little death everytime he has to introduce himself to a female client. 'Mrs. Gajodhar Ramnarayan Pandey' !!!! He knew even he wouldn't have married himself.
He wrapped his work for today and took his seat in the office-cab, frustrated, tired, sick of himself as usual, when his phone rang.
Private number...... he he he
"What the **** is this?"
He looked around. No one. He looked at his phone again.
Pick up.. you suspicious moron.
The phone almost slipped off his hand.
"Hello??"
"Hello Gajodhar, this is GOD"
This time the phone slipped but held on tothe neckstrap.
"Who???"
"You heard me fine. I am GOD."
"Listen buddy, this is not the right time. I am not in a mood of silly jokes. So either come to the point or hang up."
"Ok, hang up if you don't want to talk. But do one thing. Turn the phone handsfree and put on the earphones."
He did so and hung up. There was silence but for 2 seconds only.
"Does it work??"
"Holy crap!!! Who the hell are you ? Leave me alone."
"I can force you to listen to me but that'll make you look a lot more paranoid. So be a good boy and talk. It won't harm you and definitely won't cost you."
[silence]
"So, you are GOD!!! Why should I believe that?"
"Gajodhar Ramnarayan Pandey. Son of Ramnarayan Batukeshwar Pandey. Born in Munger, Bihar, India on 20th September, 1966 at 7:14 am."
"Office database."
"Once suspended from school while pouring chalk dust on your teacher's back."
"School records."
"Have one major and three minor crushes on female colleagues."
"Common sense. Why are you wasting your time??"
"10th February, 1999. Sumedha Maitra tells you about her boyfriend and the next thing you thought was to run a truck over both of them."
"Well.... I...err.... I didn't mean to. Are you here to punish me for that .... (after a slight hesitation) GOD??"
"I didn't want to bring this up but you left me with no other choice."
"So why exactly are you here? Don't you have a world to protect?"
"Well.. I am planning to put up a Catastrophe later this century, and while my team is working on the blueprint, I took some time off.... you know... to relax..... have some fun."
"And I am your idea of having 'fun !!!"
"Well... not exactly. Anyways... I know it sounds cliched but.... Ask me, What do you want?"
"Really !!! Ok. For starters, Please change my name."
"And by calling yourself Tom Cruise, you expect girls to go berserk by just looking at you !! Why can't you be okay with your name? What's in a name anyway?"
"How would you know. Your name is not a haunting kind."
"That's my identity. Believe me, you don't want to know my name."
"OK. Give me a good wife. Nobody wants to be Mrs. Gajodhar Ramnarayan Pandey."
"So to you marriage is all about nameplates.. right? You just assume things won't work instead of actually trying to make them work. If you are so sure that changing your name will change everything, why didn't you change it yourself?"
"Ha ha ha. Very funny. As if you don't know."
"Ok, I accept. But isn't it fair to keep my share of sense of humor before distributing it to mankind?"
"Yes. Laugh. Laugh at me all you want. You don't know how it feels being laughed at. You don't know how it feels when your colleagues don't take you seriously. You don't know how it feels when the colony kids throw a ball in my house just to call my name. You haven't seen the supressed smiles of the ladies when I introduce myself to them. You have made me for fun, didn't you. I am a clown for you and this damn world of yours. I am the comic relief. I am the Joker. Laugh at me all you want."
"Done? Typical Gajodhar Ramnarayan Pandey. Why are you such a bitter man? This world is a nice place to live, provided you want to. Look at the positives dear. You are cribbing about something absolutely silly and worthless as compared to some of the serious troubles the world is going through."
"Look who speaks. Weren't we taught that all this has been created by you? And you have made me a part of this crap of yours."
"So, you think you are a part of those homeless children in Africa. You think you are a part of the slum-dwellers in Mumbai who sleep, not knowing whether they'll ever wake up again. You think you are a part of innocent victims of terrorism. You think you are a part of the lives of those unfortunate soldiers who either died or got disabled during the war inflicted upon them by a bunch of egoistic politicians. You think you are a part of the innocent children forced to beg for survival. You think you are a part of the world where girls are sold for money.
I accept that the world didn't turn out to be the way it was supposed to be, but then people like you are not helping either. The next time you crib about your life and your so-called stupid name, just remember one thing.... There are millions of people who would be much more than happy to trade lives with you. The question is: Are you willing to trade lives with any of them?
"

"No. I won't"

"Why not? This is your house. You have to get down so that the rest of us can go home." Shekhar, his colleague and office-cab-mate was already getting late.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Words-Worth

Of the infinite amount of crap we are forced to hear 24X7, few words/phrases stick with us. Here are some of my favorites:

The Show must go on.

Entirely self-explanatory. The show MUST go on. We just can't stop, for anything. If something goes wrong, we tend to stop and crib and whine. But the best thing to do is to learn and move on. Life doesn't stop, so shouldn't we.

Life is a Drama.

Shakespeare defined LIFE in the shortest and probably the best possible way. We have our entry, we play our part and we exit. LIFE continues. The only difference is that LIFE is a play of infinite length and infinite characters. We don't have a choice of our entry, but we can surely decide how to exit.

Sweetheart.
Though I have never had a chance to really use it, the lucky ones would know how much does this one word convey. I find this word extremely romantic.

Just do it.
The Nike tagline inspired a US President( i think he was Nixon) to get married !! This tells it all. If you want to do something, then forget about this world, don't care, follow your instincts, and JUST DO IT.

Fight on.
The slogan of USC, conveying the true sportsman spirit. You may be down and out. You may be overpowered. You may be on the verge of defeat. Never give up. Always FIGHT ON.

aaj main upar, aasman neeche.

Ecstasy expressed in the best possible way. I am very lucky to have actually felt this feeling on two different days:
20th June,2003--- The day when I got through into IIT.
25th February,2007---- The day when I got Fellowship offer from USC.
These words completely express my state of mind on these two days.

Coming back to life.
Though the lyrics of this masterpiece by Pink Floyd is itself extremely good, I like the title more. We all have our moments when we feel down and out. Everything seems to come to an end. We are just about to give up when LIFE drags us back into its mainstream and forces us to stay in there. Slowly and gradually we get engulfed by the rigors of Life. We all have our instances of Coming back to Life.

Underdog.
I really love this word. Underdog. No one expects you to win. No one bets on you. You are free to do what you want. You are not burdened. You don't have to answer. You go unnoticed. And when you actually win, it is Unbelievable. You take the world by surprise. And You love it.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Gray matter

Nothing's pure black or pure white. Of course, one would say there are colors but then every color can be transformed into gray-scale and then all you get is different shades of gray. Not Black, not White, but Gray.
The point is.... no one is Good or Evil. Each one of us is a shade of Gray. As they say, nothing is 100%. So, if you think straight and conclude that I am a bad guy, you probably have erred somewhere. Also, if somehow you have managed to convince yourself that I am a good guy, you are in for a big surprise. The good me and the evil me are obviously at loggerheads to each other and the good me manages to keep the evil me under wraps, but not always. And when the evil me surfaces, he surprises even himself. I recalled one such instance.

Class X(A)
TATA DAV School, Sijua; Dhanbad
Jharkhand, India
Sometime in mid-1999

It may seem a silly, totally not worth mentioning after 8 years thing to you but then it is important to me. School days can be extremely silly at times. You have your groups of guys and girls, there are crushes, flowers, all kinds of stupid games, flirting, the guy-talk, the girl-talk, the gifts, the cards, the free periods and of course, that delicate age. I also had a small group. The entire class looked at us skewedly. The teachers turned hostile. The brothers and sisters were asked questions. But who cared. We used to do what we liked to and "to hell with them".
There was a girl in my group. Being known to us for about 2 years then, she was relatively new given that the rest of us had studied together since 1988. And she was different. With respect to those times and situations, one can safely say.. she was a rebel. I had not met such a lively and fun-loving girl in my life. And we really hit it off from day 2. There was an easyness associated with her. She and me shared some hilarious, unforgettable incidents and quotes. She was, and will remain very special to me.

Fast forward to the day of the incident.
I don't remember the reason now. But one day there was heated argument and a scuffle between us. I remember she had pulled my sweater but I don't remember anything else. What happened after that, disturbs me to this day. My 'other' friends took it worse than me and then there was a heavy dose of "tit for tat", "be a man", "revenge" and the likes. The evil me was pulled out. I went to her and had a quick, hard go at her ponytail. (I told you it will seem silly.)I thought we were even. But few minutes later, when the teacher entered the class, he asked her if she was all right. And then I saw her, with eyes full of tears. She was hurt, not physically. Believe me or not, those tears make me very uncomfortable to this day.
After that, there are again blank patches in my memory. I remember giving my book to her when she asked for another guy's book, to initiate the damage-control. And the next thing I remember is her last day in school. She left the school after a month or so. I don't remember how things worked out between us. And I certainly don't remember apologizing.
All I remember is that of all people, I had hurt her. And I, hereby, apologize to her.

I AM EXTREMELY SORRY for that day. I never meant to hurt you, in any which way.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Ad-ded

Had my first mid-sems outside India, and though I managed to convince myself to believe that they went well, after getting the marks of one of the papers, I seriously doubt that now. But nevermind, I have a habit of screwing up exams. So this is another feather in my i-know-how-to-screw-exams hat.
Average scores did matter in India also, but continuous occurrence of this not-so-auspicious event may lead to me getting kicked back from US, which I definitely NOT want. So, I better increase the performance efficiency of my grey cells. My grey cells, By the way, have a tedency to play hide-n-seek with me and they somehow manage to excel in the 'hide' aspect during the exams. Anyways, it is between me and them. You don't need to worry.
What you do need to do is ...... watch this.

I just had one word for it: BRILLIANT.
I have tremendous respect for the (good) ad-makers. They manage to convey so much in so less time that one has to simply say... HATS OFF. And though I haven't watched many American, or for that matter many non-Indian, commercials, I have a feeling that when it comes to making ads, no one can beat Indian ads. Not that every Indian ad is good, but when an Indian ad is good, it is the BEST. The western ads can at best be whacky, corny, and the likes but I don't think they match the humor of our ads.
Talking of ads, did you know:
  • The man behind the exceptionally briliant ads of 'Happydent White chewing gum' is none other than the lyricist of Rang De Basanti, Mr. Prasoon Joshi. Take a look:
  • The singer in the Pepsi ad with Sachin Tendulkar and a bunch of kids in a desert, with lines going somewhat as:
Umad ghumad kar jiyara garje,
Dil ye bole, jhoom ke dole, taare choo le.
Arre pyaas badhi hai aaj to bhar le
Khol ke bandhan, tod ke taale ,
Ye dil maange mooooooore.

is the one and only ... apna Mungeri laal, Raghuvir Yadav.
  • The man who says "Fevicol aisa jod lagaye, acche se accha na tod paaye" in the famous Fevicol ad with an elephant and people doing tug-of-war to break a piece glued by Fevicol (the one with Zor laga ke haisha) is Rajkumar Hirani... yes .. the man who gave us Munnabhai.

  • The sardarji pilot who is seen at the end of the 1999 World Cup Cricket Pepsi ad with Sachin Tendulkar, Shane Warne and Brian Lara is Prahlad Kakkar, the creator of the ad and the greatest adman in India.
Jai Ho all the great Ad-makers.
c ya

Thursday, September 20, 2007

The elementary code break

..... continued from here

Twenty20
Two2
You are to see an ass
To2

Shekhar saw something different in the words. Each word had sound of a character.

You are to see an ass
Ur2cns
It was a password !!! Shekhar knew that since You began with a capital letter, it was U and not u.
So he had a password now, but of what? Instinct said it was of an e-mail account. No body was going to spend even a penny on such a game. So it HAD to be a free account. And the account server HAD to be a popular one since there was no clue about the account. So, the most popular e-mail accounts were.... G-mail, Yahoo and Hotmail. Since Shekhar had made a g-mail account for his father few months back, he knew a g-mail pasword should have minimum 8 characters. So g-mail was ruled out. He opened the Yahoo homepage and then paused. He had a password but only a password. "What's the username?", he asked himself. "Mr. Code had given the password, he MUST have given the username. Think."
By now Shekhar's brain was all charged up and working overtime. One look at the Yahoo homepage and another at the note he had received and he got it. Username is always above the password.
for shekhar
Y r s n o e e a u t e s a o a s
The most probable usernames based on the note were "for_shekhar" and"for.shekhar".
As he was about to enter them in the Yahoo homepage, his instincts took over him and he decided to try hotmail.com first.

e-mail address: for_shekhar ; password:Ur2cns ...... username and passwords don't match.

e-mail address: for.shekhar ; password: Ur2cns ....... Welcome Guest.

Shekhar was in. No messages except one in drafts.
Everything was blank except the body and it read:

claudus sanctus
39-6-23-7-51-26-81-87-85-51-71-11-14-59-105-47-12-51-90-36-27-105-68-104-17
Let light and truth prevail

Mr. Code had laid the path for Shekhar and all Shekhar had to do was follow the path. And he was walking fast now. In this code, the only thing known to him was the last line.

Let light and truth prevail. It is the official motto of Patel Hall of Residence,IIT Kharagpur, the place where Shekhar spent his most memorable days as an undergraduate. The actual motto is Lux et Veritas Vincent, which is in Latin.
"I am getting closer Mr. Code". Shekhar now knew what claudus sanctus meant. He just had to translate it from Latin to English. He used the first translator Google offered him and the result was "lame holy". Shekhar knew he broke this code but just to make sure, he translated "sanctus" and got "holy, sacred, saint". He got what he was looking for... "saint".

So he was now left with
lame saint
39-6-23-7-51-26-81-87-85-51-71-11-14-59-105-47-12-51-90-36-27-105-68-104-17

To Robert Langdon, O lame saint would mean The Monalisa, but for Shekhar and everyone who had read it, it would simply mean The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown. And anyone who have read Dan Brown would instantly know what these numbers meant. Each number had to be replaced by the 1st letter of the corresponding chapter in 'The Da Vinci Code'.
Shekhar did the same and got:

a h s t e d t t y e a u w t n r r e h o s n n r w

It didn't make sense but then he counted the no. of characters. It was 25, a perfect square. The Transposition Cipher was immediately applied and the message appeared.
Shekhar was now smiling.


Saturday, September 15, 2007

The elementary code

It was yet another morning in his new world for Shekhar. About a month ago he had landed in this country for his PhD. And though his resume suggests that he intended to do a high quality research, his friends in IIT Kharagpur knew that the sole reason for him doing PhD was that he could go to USA. What started as a possiblity in 2003, became an obsession by 2006, especially after he failed to get a Foreign Training during the summer of 2006. Perhaps only GOD knew how he would have reacted had he not got through. But that is no one's worry now as Shekhar somehow made it to the US and is very content, to say the least.
He had just finished the first class of the day in Vivian Hall of Engineering, the 7-storeyed building which hosts his department. The Downtown LA looks very beautiful from the top of VHE with the extension of Hollywood Hills forming the backdrop behind the high-rises and the not-so-high rises. After the class he used to sit in his desk in Seaver Science Centre-300. The SSC -300 was an extension of his reearch group. In general, SSC hosts many laboratories and offices. As he settled down in his chair, he saw a note stuck on the board. The content of the note clearly meant it was for him. It read:

for shekhar
Y r s n o e e a u t e s a o a s

"Ok", Shekhar said to himself, "what the hell is this !!"
No one was around to answer. His office-mates had not arrived yet. But even if they did, it was no point asking or doubting them as he was still a newbie in the office and the occasional 'Hi's were all they exchanged. Shekhar himself was a big time introvert which kept on postponing any meaningful communication what-so-ever. He did have some meaningless communications with the girl whose desk was beside his, owing to her talkative nature. But still it was too early for her to play such prank on him. He did doubt her for few moments given that she was a Computer Science Major, specializing in Process Optimization , but that was it. She couldn't have done that. This note was left for him by someone who knew him very well.
Though Shekhar did not pay much attention to studies when he was in IIT, he liked things that were out of norm. And this little note really excited him. He set down to decode it.

for shekhar
Y r s n o e e a u t e s a o a s

the first line clearly was an address to him. All he had to do was to decode the next line. He was not into books much, the total number of books he had read being in single digits. But he had read Dan Brown, all of them, and loved them. And by the nature of the code, he knew that the person behind the code was also a Dan Brown fan. Shekhar never knew that he had to actually apply Dan Brown some day. But nevertheless, he started. He counted the no. of letters in the code which turned out to be 16.
"That's it. You are not so smart, Mr. Code."
Few of the earliest methods of encryption were invented by Julius Caesar. There was Caesar Cipher, which decoded the message by a lateral shift in the alphabets. But Shekhar knew this code is a problem of Caesar Square, now known as The Transposition Cipher. Since 16 is a perfect square, it can be written in a 4X4 matrix. The Code is written across in a square matrix and is then read downwards. When the code was written in a matrix form, it appeared like:

Y r s n
o e e a
u t e s
a o a s

And reading it downwards, Shekhar got
Y o u a r e t o s e e a n a s s
Which, after adding the spaces, became :
You are to see an ass

"What the ****. What the hell does that mean?", Shekhar was not at all pleased. Apparently Mr. Code was not that stupid either. Succumbing to instincts, Shekhar actually looked down the window to see.... well ... if there actually an ass was around. But it was not to be.
"Ok, Mr. Code. You want to play it. Let's play." Shekhar loved such challenges. Not that he was very good at overcoming them, but he loved to try and give it his best shot.

You are to see an ass

"I will see an ass. There can't be an actual ass inside the campus or, for that matter, outside the campus unless someone had a pet ass." If not actual ass, then comes the more widely used meaning of ass. Shekhar now found a different kind of humor in the latter part of his previous statement. "But there are so many of them. What's so special", he thought, coming back to the problem in hand.
It HAS to be something different.
He thought his brains out but no use. He couldn't get anything out of the sentence. "Did I decipher it right?", he doubted his method. "No, it can't be a mere co-incidence that the code contained 16 characters. The words were chosen to make it a perfect square. The method is correct.", he reassured himself.

You are to see an ass

He had by now repeated this phrase umpteenth times in his mind. Still no result. He decided to give himself himself a break. And during the 'break', while his subconscious was still trying to figure out the code, his conscious surfed the net. He opened his favorite sites and after going through his mails, orkut and facebook accounts , he moved on to indiatimes.com for the latest news. India had defeated Pakistan 3-0 in the Twenty20 World Cup Tournament. Now the margin of victory sounded more like a soccer or hockey result, except that it was a cricket match result. The match had ended in a tie and the winner was decided with a bowl-out. As amusing as this may sound, some signals were exchanged between his conscious and subconscious and BANG !!! It wasn't the tournament, but its name and the way it was written that gave him the clue. The code was broken.

...... to be continued

Friday, September 07, 2007

Accently challenged !!!

US is a multi-ethnic country, and my university totally seconds this fact. One can find students from all over the world, of course some forming the majority and the rest minority.
As the class began today, the Teaching Assistant said, " While studying Quantum Mechanics, most students sink..."

O Dear GOD ... where did you send me !!! Why on this earth did I take this course?? Help me.... please give me enough strength so that I don't sink !!!

GOD responded pretty early, some 3 seconds later.
The TA had actually said, "............ most students think.... "
This was the severest accentation of a word that I could comprehend till now.
More 'words' followed...
  • Unnergy [Energy]
  • Sun [Some]
  • Planket [Bracket] ( though I am not sure about this one as she might have said Planck's constant really really fast.)
  • Puthential [Potential]
The TA is not an American, by the way. One student asked the question, "Was zero there?"
Nothing wrong with the question except that the question actually asked was, " Why is zero there?"
All this after the now regular
  • Khalkhiulate [calculate]
  • khool [cool]
  • thoo [two]
  • zerow [zero]
  • fo [four]
  • etc.
Everytime I have to tell my phone no. , I try to accentise it the American way to help them comprehend it faster and since my no. contains 22, I have to say it like " .... thoo thoo ...." , which, in India, would directly infer that I hate my no.

And then comes my name. The following are some of the ways I am called here:
  • A ... what ? [answer] ...O .... ok.... A... Adaaaaaarsh [close but fine]
  • Shikhaaaaaaaar [not your fault buddy]
  • A.. ok I'll spell out the first name ... A...d...a....r....s...h [ya... tht's me :)]
I am on my way to become Adaaaaaaarsh Shikhaaaaaar.
The study train is gaining speed. I hope I match up to it.

c ya